Stupid language barrier

Last night I tried to tell my host mother that I'm 23, I'm a woman I'm not a child. But instead I said I'm 23. I'm married. I'm not a child. She got very worried and talked to my language trainer today.

ohhhh bulgarski

"What's my town like?!" "It's very scary"

....I wish I could say that I was kidding but the quote of this blog post is something that actually happened. Apparently there was a big earthquake here 20 years ago and that's what this region is known for. So I just got back from my site and I'm glad that I had a couple of days without internet because I would have let loose. I'm sure many of you got panicked emails from me but no worries I'm feeling a lot better. I'll be spending the next 2 years in a small town of about 5,000 people in North Central Bulgaria. My first reaction when I got of the train was like a scene in an old Western movie. I was waiting for a tumbleweed to blow past me while I was crossing the railroad tracks. Yes, you have to walk over the tracks to get across them which really goes against everything I know about never touching the third rail, maybe that's a piece of information only New York kids are ingrained with. Anyway, since my apartment isn't ready I thought I was being taken to a hotel but here hotel means a room above a gas station. I definitely had to fight back the tears for the first day and a half but don't worry I'm already feeling better and everyone I met was so excited that I was there. Actually the more common response was "You're from New York? Why are you here? Bring me with you when you leave?" Another bonus is that there's another volunteer in my town. She's been here for about a year, this is pretty rare for the Peace Corps to put two volunteers in the same site but it's definitely a bonus and I'm very excited. I hope she is ready for me. I haven't met her yet but everyone at my school knows her and kept telling me that we have the same Hollywood movie white teeth.  So my placement isn't exactly what I would have picked for myself l but I feel pretty lucky with everything I do have especially since I got a text from my friend the first night we were at our sites saying "Walking into my hotel was like walking into the 7th circle of hell." Peace Corps I'm trusting you with your judgment so don't muck it up. Oh yeah side note, I'm now teaching mostly primary school instead of secondary. It's still a little up in the air but I'm just going to run with it. 

Exactly one month from today I will swear in and become an official volunteer!!!!!

It's the final countdown....well not really.

Well peeps, I've been here for about a month now and this Thursday I will finally get my permanent site placement! I tried explaining that to my host mother and this is how the conversation went via English translation "Thursday I go to Vratsa then I don't know" Ok so you'll be home Thursday. "No Vratsa to not Vratsa uhhh Vratsa maybe?" I don't understand you. "I live in Bulgaria for two years I don't know?" I don't understand....Here eat something. 

At this point my Bulgarski is still not good enough to say. Dearest Totka, I shall depart for Vratsa on Thursday to commence my journey to the site I will be volunteering in for the next 2 years. Please wish me the best on this perilous journey and if you must make me a sandwich please use a light hand with the butter and skip the chicken. I saw it sitting out last night and your lack of concern for refrigeration makes me uncomfortable to say the least. 

I don't even know if some of those tenses exist in the Bulgarian language.  Anyway, these past couple of days have been used to pick our sites. What's great to know is that the Peace Corps actually cares that you are happy where you get placed. I had my site placement interview and my teaching feedback session last Friday. My classes have definitely hit some highs and lows that I was not prepared for. Favorite high of last week during a game where the kids had to name different actors a girl shouts out "Dean Cain" As in TVs Superman and Ripley's Believe it or Not?What? How do you even know who that is? Favorite low of last week. Completely losing control of my 9th graders. I think one of them told me she hated me. Siigh. However she was a little trouble maker and I don't think her English is good enough to even understand what she was saying.  My class Friday went pretty well. For all you TEFL teachers out there. English Jeopardy is a great review for grammar and a great test to see how much American culture has reached even the smallest towns of Bulgaria. They got the question right about "What movie/book stars a vampire named Edward and girl named Bella" before I even finished my sentence but neither team could answer "Where is the headquarters of the United Nations" Stephanie Myers-2 Elani and all that is good in the world-0

As for the site placement interview, well that I would equate to a first date. You want to seem like you know what you want while being laid back enough and not too needy. My town currently has about 10,000 people and I kinda dropped the hint by saying "So I'm from a city of 8 million people this is enough of an adjustment I don't think I could handle a town smaller than this" Hmm maybe that wasn't so subtle. But it was a pretty great interview overall. It was good to get a chance to sit down with someone and find out about projects you could work on outside of teaching. The only umm moment I had was when asking me if I would want to be near other volunteers. This was a double edged sword as I was nervous to say yes and seem like I was too dependent on other Americans and if I say no does that mean they're going to stick me to the furthest reaches of Bulgaria? I didn't even really have a chance to answer as my interviewer looked and me and said "You seem independent, you'll make bulgarian friends" then he made some notes and I sat there in a daze after all that happened. Either way I'm sure it'll be great. Besides I would rather be far from anyone than close to someone I really don't like. Yeah I said it. 

After we find out where we're going we spend a few days getting to know our counterpart at the volunteer site then we actually go there for a few days. I'll have the opportunity to see the school I'll be teaching at and even a chance to get to see the place I will live. Then I have to find my way back home by myself on Tuesday or Wednesday. That will be very interesting with my Bulgarian. I'm sure I will have stories. Lets just hope I don't end up in any of the other Balkan countries on my way back. Fingers crossed.

Why is my name so ugly in Bulgarian?

So it's official. While some men may have shaved off their beards to blend in with the sleek look of the European male I too have had to assimilate by going by Ellie. I kinda like Ellie so it's ok and I'm tired of being called "Loni". For some reason my thought process goes from Loni Anderson to conjuring up an image of Louie Anderson (please google both of these people immediately if you do not know who I'm talking about). 

While I've definitely had to get used to certain Bulgarian nuances I'm also making Bulgarians get used to some things that I cannot give up. For example, even in this blistering heat I still make time to go running. So first off, no one in this country runs. I was surprised to hear my students say that they like to go running, but I'm realizing that it's just an easy verb to say. After a run with my friend the other day we saw some people sprinting down the street, we thought FINALLY, but nope, it was raining and they were just trying to get inside. It's nice to finally be doing something a little more physical though. We spend all day in class and lectures and while it may be mentally exhausting I need something physical to match that. Sure we may have to sprint across the highway but the back road that we run on usually has horses and sheep and other wild life that creeps along in the bushes making sure I keep my pace up. And while people usually stare (and sometimes yell "Where are you from?!" in Bulgarski of course) people more seem to be fascinated. One man even made the gesture that you make to get a trucker to honk his horn. I'm not really sure what that had to do with us running but he was smiling so I think it meant something good.  I'm positive that the assimilation will happen more and more over these next 2 months with the host fam and even more over the next 2 years. Let's just hope that it doesn't involve me chain smoking and dating men who wearing fanny packs across their chests and mesh tank tops. 

I was gonna listen to that, but then, um, I just carried on living my life.

Zdravete! 

So it seems like a lot of people want to know what I'm doing here, besides the whole attempt at promoting world peace and friendship. Let me give you a run down of a typical day in Bulgaria for me. 

7 am: Mama Toni bangs on the door and informs me that it's time for breakfast. Ok apparently my host mother thinks I'm Michael Phelps with the amount of food that she gives me. In America we serve ourselves but Mama Toni laughs at that idea and then gives me eskimo kisses. Yeah I know. Breakfast is always served to me. This morning for example I had a tomato, a piece of bread that was dipped in what I can only assume was butter then fried,and hunk of cheese. I'm starting to learn to not finish everything on my plate even though I want to be polite. I can feel my arteries hardening. 

8:15ish

Off to school! We usually have a session of Bulgarian language in the morning. Though there are 62 volunteers currently training we are all at different sites for this process. At my site there are 3 other volunteers so we have pretty intense language and life lessons. My language instructor is also like my babysitter and leads my group everywhere. Seriously I know maybe 10 verbs. Still don't know the verb "to go" which makes every conversation very interesting. Typical sentence "I school at 8". Did I mention my host mother doesn't speak any English?

9:40ish

Off to the local high school to take some names and teach some English. My classes are very entertaining. That's really all I can say. Today I taught a 7th grade class and by taught I mean I didn't know what I was going to do with them so I made them all introduce themselves to me. Some highlights from today include: asking a 13 year old girl her favorite band and her response was AC/DC. Seriously? I thought she was messing with me. When I asked another girl her favorite book she said "Twilight" I proceeded to throw her out of my class. Kidding. But seriously I felt the same response that the priest did from The Exorcist when Linda Blair throws up on him. Stephanie Myers you win again. 

11:30

Back to Bulgarian class. I usually say something completely wrong and Vesi (my language instructor) looks like she's going to jump over the table and kill me.  Lies. She loves me. She calls me Ellie which I kinda like. Fun Fact: In Bulgaria it's tradition to give a shirt to someone whenever you give them a nickname. Who knew?

12:30 Feeding time back at the zoo. 

2:00 Back to Bulgarski. It's usually this time of day when I start to fade. The words just stop making sense and I can't stop laughing at everything everyone says. 

4:30 

Coffee time. This is the time of day to decompress and form sentences like a grown up again. That is before we head back home and struggle again with our host families and lack of Bulgarski. I love the blank stares. I just smile and shake my head (head nod means no here and head shake means yes). 

The evenings are spent partaking in cross cultural interactions. Mostly I watch Toni freak out over the Techenya. From what I gather Techenya is a cross between the boogeyman and El Nino. Literally it's a draft, yes a breeze. So if I have my window open my door as to be closed so I can't get any cross ventilation. Or when I get out of the shower the entire apartment has to be boarded up because my hair is wet. They just think you're going to get sick. I blame Techenya for my everyday misfortunes and shake my fist angrily at the sky. But that's pretty much the standard day. A few deviations here and there but that is my life 6 days a week. I'll find out my permanent site in a couple of weeks which is great/scary...I was recently informed that some people end up in predominately Turkish areas so I could be learning Turkish in a couple of weeks. But lets cross that bridge when we come to it but for now Spoko (relax). 

Weird I have a blog...

Ahhh at long last. The girl who once said "I don't even know what a blog is" ahem "web-log" has finally figured out how to work this thing. I feel as technologically savvy as my baba (that's grandmother in Bulgarian) who yells into her phone instead of talking into it. I'm not sure but maybe it's because she thinks that you actually have to get the person to hear you across town. But yes I'm in Bulgaria! Currently in the Vratsa region. Sorry stalkers but Peace Corps rules prevent me from disclosing my actual location in case someone decides to come a creepin to my town. What I can tell you is that I'm in love with this country so far. It's been kind of a whirlwind of emotions and exhaustion but every day is a challenge and an adventure. We learned definite articles today which means that I can finally say I love the soup instead of I love soup, I love bread, I love lamp. We're still working on the verbs people, give me a break I've only been here 2 weeks!! Ok well living with a baba has turned me into a baba and I must go get my 11 hours of sleep. More updates to come! I'm sure I'll have plenty of stories....remember this is only week 2 and I have 8 glorious weeks of awkward interactions with the host fam to come.